Jeff Newman is an amazing, enriching ex Hay local. Words do not even begin to do him justice, not only can he light up a room, but he can fill it and every person in it with warmth. When working at a local café, I recall the time he lived in town, and everyone would say with cheer, “Here comes Jeff and Michael,” when they walked in, because it would truly brighten our day. Jeff’s paternal grandparents originated from Germany and came to Australia during the war. As they were German, they anglicised their surname from Neumann to Newman. “Some relatives have changed it back to the original spelling,” Jeff recalled. Jeff reflects on the private nature of the previous generations, commenting he knows little family history, as it was not imparted in the way it is now. “Hiding the sins of the past I think,” he said jokingly. “My grandparents were very stern-looking. “My grandfather, Dad’s father, moved to Griffith. They were share farmers, walked off the farm in the big drought. My father and his brother worked for their father. “Grandfather could drive heavy machinery, so he set up business as a road contractor.” His mother, Isabel, was a Hay girl from the start. Her parents, the Waters, lived on the river bend in a camp. His mother’s father went off to war several times, and sadly ended up passing on in a tractor accident when he was 56. His father, Milton, was referred to as Chappie. “Mum called him Chippie, and that gradually turned into Chappie,” he laughed. His mother, Elizabeth, was referred to as Isabel. Milton and Isabel met in 1956, and married. A working-class family, as many were, Jeff and his family lived in a shed originally, at their Macauley Street residence. “It was amazing, we had a great childhood,” Jeff recalled. “Dad worked really long hours to support us, and was not paid much. "We were never poor though; we had a lot of love.” Interestingly Milton’s’ mother Hilda, Jeff’s grandmother was opposed to Milton and Isabel’s marriage, as Isabel already had two children to a previous marriage by this time. “She did not relent on her position,” Jeff remarked. “When my grandparents would come and visit us in the shed, she would sit outside, she wouldn’t come in.” Jeff grew up in Hay, leaving the town early, at the age of 15. “It did not suit my lifestyle back then, and I wanted to get out and see the world,” Jeff said with a smile. It was a large family, with five girls and four boys. Milton had pride in, and paid avid at tention to detail in his yard and home exterior, with a flourishing vegetable garden, keeping bees, and making sure the yard was manicured and immaculate. Isabel was the inside counterpart, always washing cooking and cleaning, and did her important role well. They were a traditional family, with Sunday roasts and the like. “We were so lucky, we always had love, and still have that as a family now,” Jeff said. “We are very close as a family to this day, we have arguments yes, but we do not hold grudges and once an issue is resolved we move on.” When his father wasn’t working all the time, the family would often be lovely,” he recalled. down at the river, swimming, sitting enjoying the riverbend, and fishing. “We spent a lot of time at Sandy Beach, Bushy Bend and Six Mile,” Jeff recalled. “Dad would also take us woodcutting, we loved it. I remember we would dive deep down, looking for mussels, Dad told us how delicious they were. "We got them home, and opened them up in water, and it turns out they were not good at all, but it was still great fun. "Another of my favourite things was when you stayed still in one spot in the river, and shrimps would come and bite on your toes.” Hay Park was also somewhere where Jeff spent a lot of time, and a place he remembers very clearly from childhood. “There were many peacocks, that would roam the park and even the streets, you would hear the squarks ev erywhere. It was amazing. I would love to walk through the park, with the pond and ducks, and the huge fig trees. "Then, after the time of the peacocks was over, they had the big bird aviary, it was all just like a fantasy, absolutely amazing.” Another one of young Jeff’s pursuits was spending time at the pool, sunbathing and having fun. “It was the place to be. We used to lie on the scorching cement and sun bake, getting cooked,” Jeff laughed. “The Hay Show was another high light each year. We had a family friend named Doug, he would take Talayah and I to the show. He would buy her a kewpie doll; she was obsessed with those. "This was the late 60s, and it was just a giant big fantasy land for us, the show. We hadn’t seen that sort of stuff. “We marvelled at clowns and side show alley, there was many times pulling weeds to earn enough money to go.” Jeff recalled not having many friends as a child, but having a lot of fun with the ones he had. “We would go to Madman’s Bend riding bikes, Allen Bush and I. We went tadpoling, they seemed to be huge back then. We took some home and they turned into frogs. “Hills was an epic child’s mecca. I still remember going down, and buying a ten-cent bag of mixed lollies, and it was a huge bag. “Umbrella lollipops were good too.” Jeff was friends with Anthony Bennett whose parents, George and Aileen, let Jeff do jobs around the store for pocket money. It was convenient for Jeff, as he often stayed the night. He would pack fridges in the storeroom, and still remembers the old bottles, and those times fondly. As was common for the times, Jeff’s parents would go to the Highway Inn, leaving the children in the car, bringing them a packet of chips and a coke. “My great friend Julie Smith, Donohoe in those days, lived across the road, and we would play together all the time, and collect stamps. Mrs Donohoe’s mother, Jan Pocock, lived up the road and was friends with my mum, and Flo Clifton was right next door. “On hot nights they would sit in the gutter and drink and a smoke, ‘Poey’ was like another mother to me, we had a close community feel in our part of Macauley Street.” At school, Jeff remembers getting bottles of milk, and if they were lucky and had money, they could get tomato soup or a pie at the canteen. At the school social, he would have stood against the wall if not for Lisa Seaman. “We would always go together to socials and things, and dance."It was Jeff’s father was well respected around town. As Jeff grew older, his father moved onto motor work as well, being a motor mechanic. He went around town and on properties in his role, fixing tractors, lawn mowers, farm machinery, and more. “I was such a cheeky kid, it’s amazing what you shake your head at as an adult,” Jeff laughed. “I remember Dad driving us around in the back of his green station wagon, because I was embarrassed.” Jeff’s parents’ marriage ended when he was 11 years old. “Mum left and the family broke up,” he said. “Mum took the four youngest girls and moved to Melbourne, and us five other children stayed in Hay with Dad. "After this time, I began to become a bit rebellious. I was just starting high school, and had some friends but not a lot. I signed out at the age of 15, I couldn’t stand it any longer. "I worked for a time with Hay Shire Council in parks and gardens and doing the cricket pitch, getting the roller going.” Jeff’s parents remained good friends until Milton passed away. Isabel and the children would return to visit, and the sisters Wendy, Liz and Cynthia returned to Hay as teens. Before he signed out of school, Jeff was a bit lost, a little wayward, to use his terms, and was taken under the wing of Elsie Seaman and Steven Antonakas. “Antonakas had a fruit shop located where Treloar’s Coffee Shop (now AM and Co Hairdressing) was located,” he recalled. “There was always the won derful smell of the fresh fruit and vege tables. “Elsie’s parents had the Majestic Movie Theatre (now Antonakas Home Hardware), and everything about it was fabulous. "It felt so big back then, I would go and watch the movies and to see Elsie working, I remember the torches going up and down the aisles. “Elsie had a little green mini, and she would come and pick me up and we would go lapping, and go to the Paragon Café (now Two Billy Buttons), and the Garden of Roses café (now the Engie building), they were magical times.” After Elsie and Steve left school, Jeff was then sent to Sydney to his aunt and uncle’s. “They were very strict, and the aim was it would straighten me out, pull me into line,” he said. He worked at a timber mill for the 12 months that he was there, and then moved home to Hay and his father. “Dad wanted me to join the Army, to learn structure,” Jeff recalled. After a time, Jeff moved to Melbourne to live with Elsie and Steve, and they lived in Hanna Street, St Kilda. “For me, coming from a small town like Hay to live in Melbourne and have freedom, it was like Disneyland,” he said. “They had fun, as young adults do, went to nightclubs, and never found it hard to gain employment. “I got a job at a nightclub, and it was such fun, I met some amazing people, like Molly Meldrum, and John Michael Howard. I truly found myself during this time,” Jeff said. Jeff’s mother lived an hour away in Werribee, and he would visit her, her new partner and his youngest brother Richard often. “Melbourne felt like America,” he said. “There was so much to do, I also worked at the Prince of Wales Restau rant serving meals, and worked in the hospitality industry for a while. Restaurant work, cheffing, and more.” After a time, Jeff’s career took a different direction, and he gained employment at the Office of Intellectual Disability (OIDS), in Frankston. His role involved adolescents and child be havioural and profound disability.“It was challenging, but so reward ing. It is an amazing skill, to bond and develop a rapport and know you are making a difference,” he said. He spent years working for OIDS, in Frankston, Dandenong and Narre Warren. After a few years Jeff decided that he wanted to nurse, someone who could help people. He began working at Brighton Community Hospital, and commuted an hour from Frankston. “It was a wonderful facility, and a special time,” he said. Jeff came home to Hay to celebrate his 21st birthday, and had a party at the Showgrounds. “It wasn’t a big deal for me, I wasn’t that social,” Jeff said. “I didn’t like being around too many people. Working with patients at the hospital always felt different, because you were one on one.” Not only did Jeff enjoy working with the patients, but this is truly where his passion to be a nurse flourished. He observed and admired the way that other nurses were so caring, effective in their roles, and knowledgeable. Jeff met some well-known people while working at Brighton Hospital, Lee Martin who was visiting the matron, and Bob Hawke while Jeff was caring for Bob’s daughter. Brighton Community Hospital closed in 1984, and Jeff then chose to move a little closer to Hay and his father. He gained employment at Kurrajong Disability, which he also found very challenging but rewarding. He facili tated an intensive work program and worked with disabled adults. “That sector, like a lot of different things, was different back then,” Jeff said. “My role was to train clients and arm them with the skills to work in the community.” After working in that role for years, he then became a group home man ager, largely with young adults with autism, and worked in several different homes. It was during this time that he met a woman named Kim, who worked for Kurrajong as well. They formed a beautiful friendship. Kim had a fiancé, who left suddenly after he discovered Kim had fallen pregnant. “She reminded me of Georgie Parker, she had these beautiful blue eyes, we were soul mates,” Jeff said. Six months later, Jeff and Kim were married, and Kim gave birth to a daughter. While still working at Kurrajong, Jeff earnt qualifications through HESTA and the University of New England. After this, he left working in group homes and commenced working with children exhibiting aggressive behaviours. Jeff and Kim raised Allanah together, and enjoyed life. Jeff visited his mother often, and the little family would go to the beach, enjoy nights away at bed and breakfasts, and dinners at restaurants. Jeff then began study for Bachelor of Nursing at Charles Sturt University in Wagga. He juggled completing university in his spare time and on weekends, whilst working full time at Kurrajong. Thirteen years after they were married, Jeff and Kim divorced. “It wasn’t who I was,” Jeff recalled. “That was a very difficult and sad time.” After completing his degree, Jeff moved to the South Coast, where he accepted a role at Moruya Health Facility. He began in the general ward, then emergency department for close to seven years, which was very busy, with a trauma centre. His time at Mo ruya spanned over 20 years. During his time there, Jeff also worked in Oncology and Palliative care. “It was very difficult work,” he said. “One of my first patients was a nine-year-old girl, I did wonder what I was in for when I first made the change from emergency to Oncology and Palliative.” Jeff feels honoured and privileged to have been in palliative care and oncology. “If I can make a person’s transition from life to death the best possible journey, if I can assist in any way, I feel like I have done my job,” he said. “I feel so very privileged to be there at a person’s precious, vulnerable time, and that is why I started palliative care.” Jeff remembers some interesting situations during his time at Moruya, but they were always situations he could work through. “Moruya was a full hospital, with many departments such as high de pendency, general medical ward, maternity, children’s ward, and others. “I turned up for my afternoon shift at the high dependency ward, only to discover they had not been able to find anyone for the night duty. "So, I stayed on, and had two bowel dissections that had just come out of surgery to deal with, a wandering child, wandering elderly, as part of the 28 patients I had to handle along with a training midwife as my only help. "It was a nightmare but we made it through well,” Jeff laughed. After working in oncology and palliative care for a time, he then took on a management position, working as one of the afterhours managers. “Moruya was so much fun, it was busy, and hard sometimes. "Often, it would be a case of driving from Bateman’s Bay to Moruya at 3am, dodging roos, to pick up and drop off retrievals, and they would be unwell, you’d be squeezing blood into some one as they were being wheeled away to an aeroplane. In 2011, Jeff’s father became ill, so Jeff hung up his manager’s hat and returned to Hay. He took on the role of Deputy Nurse Manager. “I was so lucky, I was able to come home and look after Dad and still keep working,” Jeff said. “Hay was certainly a wonderful place to work, with wonderful and supporting work colleagues. “The level of pride and profession alism, from management all the way down to kitchen staff, always amazed and inspired me. The work ethic and community ownership and spirit.“The facility was fabulous, there were not many patients there initially, but as time went on, patients increased and we were also able to pur chase new emergency equipment, which was nice.” Jeff will be forever grateful that he could be there for his dad and care for him. While Jeff was working, his sisters Talayah, Cynthia and Wendy looked after him, but then he became too unwell. He had renal failure. “One day I went down the street to get gro ceries, and Mum and Dad were at home. “Dad got around using a walking frame, fell and fractured his femur. “From there, he was transferred to Wagga high dependency unit, and from there he was taken into theatre. “The prognosis was high, with us being told he may not make it through the surgery. “Within a minute of being told that, the el evator opened, and dad was wheeled out, giving us a big thumbs up, it was a surreal, shocking moment, there were plenty of tears. His hip had not been fixed properly, and his leg was stiff, but he made it.” He was then transported to Hay Hospital. He had developed a pressure sore on his heel at Wagga. They took Milton home, with regular visits from Jane Porter, the community health nurse at the time, and Jeff credits her with getting it healed. “It was hard for Dad to adjust; he was always so active and in his garden,” Jeff said. “He said to me once, ‘If a man can’t even walk, he might as well be dead.’ I palliated him at home, and as much as I was honoured to be able to do that for my father, it’s something that rips your guts out.” Milton passed at the age of 86, and the family was devastated. Jeff remained in Hay after Milton passed, but left a time after. Moving back to the South Coast, he missed Hay. “I missed going to Treloar’s for a coffee, seeing familiar faces, and having that wonderful sense of community and social atmosphere that was Hay,” he said. “It was so lovely, I felt like I was everyone’s son in a way.” His partner, Michael, was a rock to Jeff during the time of his father’s declining health and then his passing. He remained on the South Coast and looked after their house. Some family health issues rocked the couple for a time, Jeff calling it quite soul destroying. He attained a role in Moruya, where he was the in-home nurse, travelling to different homes and performing roles such as assisting cancer pa tients, performing blood transfusions, delivering 24-hour antibiotics through cannulas, infusions, dressings, and palliative care. “I ended up palliating the doctor I worked with during my time in emergency in Moruya,” Jeff recalled. “He was a legend; it was great, but very hard at the same time.” Jeff returned to Hay in 2018 to palliate his mother, another emotionally difficult task. “My brother Mark was Mum’s carer, and had been for years, and I came home to palliate her, and have not been home since,” Jeff said. However, that will change next year when the family reunites in Hay for what would have been Milton’s 100th birthday, a fitting reason for a family get-together. “I do think of Hay, of home often,” he said.“I think about the smell of the river, all the people, coffees, and fun and laughter. The camaraderie and friendship. I miss my hometown but felt I needed to leave to fulfill myself.” Michael then became unwell, so the pair decided to move to Maryborough in Queensland, where the humidity was a real factor. They had a swimming pool, but it was a very hot place to live. Jeff ended up attaining a role at the medical centre. Whilst not intending to work for a time, a trip to Divine Medical Centre for a prescription for Michael ended up in them asking Jeff if he was interested in filling the hole in their nursing staff. He initially declined, but eventually agreed and began two days a week. He had a variety of roles there, wound care, stitching, infusions, phlebotomy, and caring for cancer patients, and administering needles. Over the course of the next six months, he enjoyed the work, but seeing more than 65 patients a day, and during the time of COVID, proved to be too much, and he relinquished the role. “One of the things that I fervently believe nursing needs is the care and bond,” he said. “With that role, I felt it was not there, due to the nature of the role, too many patients. I was seeing people going through devastating events in their lives and health, and I just could not treat them the way I would have liked.” During his work at Divine, the doctor made an observation about Jeff. “While a doctor I was working with was removing someone’s skin cancer, he asked me what the spot was near my mouth,” Jeff recalled. “In the course of treating the patient we both forgot about it. “A time later he came back and said that he wanted to biopsy it, and the results came back as squamous cell carcinoma. They performed surgery, and removed part of my lip. “When the pathology came back, it was found that it had spread into my nerves. “I finished up at Divine, and then began my treatment. I had radiation over six weeks, it burnt my mouth, it was horrendous and quite painful. “Radiation was difficult. I hated having the mask on my face, I felt trapped. You can’t move on the table. “I finished radiation, and suffered a lot of side effects. This was in April this year. But I am still here, and sadly that is something a lot of people cannot say, so I count myself lucky.” Jeff and Michael now live in Grafton, moving there two months ago with their little border collie cross caboodle, Rayna, named after the Game of Thrones character. Grafton recently had its Jacaranda Festival, and huge kewpie dolls were a decorative feature. “It is interesting, every time something major happens in our lives, we end up making a move,” Jeff said. “It’s like needing to open a new chapter and get a fresh start.” Jeff is the curator of the inside of his and Mi chael’s home, with Michael caring for the yard. Jeff does help though, and the pair installed their new swimming pool fence together. Jeff is taking the time to settle in before considering work, and Mick is busily manicuring the gardens and performing yard work. The couple love to go down and sit by the Clarence River, and immensely enjoy their life there. It is fascinating and heartwarming to discover who someone truly is. Not only are people such as Jeff dazzling and warm on the outside, but possess such depth and capacity for the most important thing in life, helping others and genuinely caring.
