For families fortunate enough to have a pool, Christmas Day swimming seems like the perfect Australian tradition. In reality, it is fraught with complications. Someone always jumps in immediately after eating, despite warnings about waiting 30 minutes. Children refuse to get out when called for lunch. And there is always one relative who did not bring swimmers and either sits miserably in the heat or borrows someone's spare bathers that do not quite fit.

Pool toys become weapons. Noodles, balls and inflatable toys that seemed harmless when purchased become projectiles in the hands of overexcited children and adults who have had too much Christmas cheer. More than one Christmas has seen a toddler crying because Uncle Dave threw a pool noodle that accidentally hit them in the face.

The pool also becomes a dumping ground. Someone always ends up in the pool fully clothed, whether through being pushed, slipping or misguided attempts at humour. Phones, wallets and other valuables have met watery ends on Christmas Day because someone forgot to check their pockets before jumping in.

Chlorine levels on Christmas Day deserve their own discussion. Pools that are usually maintained carefully suddenly have 20 people in them, many eating and drinking whilst swimming. By evening, the water often resembles a questionable soup, leading to debates about whether anyone should still be swimming in it.

Some regional communities take Christmas decorating so seriously they have turned it into official competitions with prizes, judges and complex scoring systems. Houses are assessed on creativity, use of lights, adherence to theme and overall impact. Winners receive trophies and bragging rights that last the entire year.

This has led to an arms race of sorts, with families investing thousands of dollars in decorations to remain competitive. Some households begin planning their displays in January, immediately after taking down the previous year's effort. Design documents are created. Supply orders are placed months in advance. Installation begins in November.

The judging process itself becomes controversial. Accusations of favouritism fly. Conspiracy theories develop about judges being related to winners. Some families have been known to campaign for votes if there is a public choice component, creating campaign materials and door knocking like it is an election.

Themed displays have become increasingly elaborate. One year a family recreated the entire nativity scene with life sized figures and live animals borrowed from a local farm. Another household built a replica of the North Pole complete with a workshop where children could sit and write letters to Santa. The bar keeps rising, making it harder for new entrants to compete.

The environmental impact of these displays is rarely discussed but significant. The electricity consumed by a single elaborate Christmas light display can exceed the monthly usage of a regular household. Solar panels have become popular among competitive decorators, both for environmental reasons and to offset the costs of running displays nightly for a month.

What traditions and pastimes do you hold dear at Christmas time? Email me at [email protected]