Connie Mallet is a true rural wonder.

Very well liked in her community and district, more proverbial pies on her plate than fingers, and impeccably styled to boot, she is an incredible asset on so many levels.

Topping it all off, she is lovely and it is clear she cares.

Like so many people we see all the time that we don’t know and cannot begin to understand the many things someone has gone through in life to get them to the place and calibre of the person they are today.

Connie spoke recently at Hatfield Happening, and had the packed hall enthralled.

All of the sayings were true; you could hear a pin drop, not a dry eye in the house.

Connie’s story is one which will stick with me for a long time, and was all I could think about for days.

“Some insights I will share with you today are confronting for me, but if it will help to inspire just one of you here today, then it will be all worthwhile,” Connie said bravely, choosing to share her hardships for the sake of helping others.

When Connie came to Australia at the age of seven, she couldn’t speak a word of English.

Living in a very rough and violent neighbourhood while trying to communicate and understand this new country, Connie started to become insecure and withdrawn.

It is the most insidious, vile creatures in society who see and seek out the vulnerable for their own evil gain.

Tragically, between the ages of 11 – 15, I was repeatedly sexually abused by a senior member of the church I belonged to.

This also happened to be her dad’s closest friend, who had gained the trust of the church and Connie’s parents.

“Suffice to say that the abuse I endured during this time was dreadful but being withdrawn and insecure I told no one because I thought no one would believe me and that it was all my fault,” Connie told the audience. Connie’s insecurities only grew as she grew into adulthood.

They were further compounded by a horrific rape she endured in a Melbourne carpark one evening coming back from a business meeting in the city.

At that time, she was establishing a career in the corporate world.

“By the time I tried to get through this ordeal I was a very broken person even though I didn’t know that at the time or maybe I didn’t want to know,” she said.

“I was crying out for love and affection and my insecurities put me into a very damaging marriage with a controlling and physically and verbally abusive husband.”

A very wealthy man and well-known entrepreneur in Melbourne, under his control she was not allowed to work, buy clothes, or anything.

“After a time, I couldn’t even think for myself as he totally controlled all aspects of my life including contact with my family,” Connie shared.

“I was living in this large mansion in Toorak, caged in with no freedom, money or will of my own.”

After one too many beatings that sent her to hospital, Connie reached breaking point.

Desperately needing help, she knew of a wonderful place in Warburton that could help broken people.

She remained there for many months, with minimal contact with her family.

“As I confronted my demons head on with heavy counselling each day, I was consumed with anger and very dark thoughts of revenge, until it completely overwhelmed me and destroyed my sense of value and self-worth,” Connie said.

“At night I would have these dreadful nightmares where I would be standing at the edge of a cliff and will myself over and then wake up screaming as I fell.

“In reality I was at that precipice of self harm to ease this overwhelming, all-consuming pain.

“They moved me from room to room as I kept destroying each room I was in with my anger and pain.”

Somewhere deep inside, there was a little voice trying to reach out to Connie.

Remembering an employer saying to her, “If you look good, you feel good and if you feel good you do good”.

Drawing strength from the saying, Connie began attending her daily counselling sessions wearing makeup, wearing clothes which made her feel good.

“My counsellor said to me, “Connie you will be ok, there is something within you that wants to fight this”.

“He gave me a visual example that I still use today.

“He said there are two types of people in the world; you go to a gallery and there is this large beautiful painting on the wall.

“You stand back, admire the picture.

Suddenly you see a speck of dirt on the painting and you start concentrating on that speck until you see nothing of the beauty of the picture, just the dirt.

“The other type of person sees the speck, but stands back and sees the picture in its beautiful entirety; the speck doesn’t ruin the beauty of the picture for them.”

It was a pivotal moment for Connie.

She realised regardless of who hurt her and how badly they hurt her, no amount of anger or focusing on dark thoughts of revenge would fix and make her better.

“The only weapon that could heal my immense pain was living within me; only I could make things better for myself, no one else, the power was within me,” she said.

During the day while at Warburton, she would go to a quiet place in the garden.

Instead of thinking dark thoughts, she began thinking about herself, and reaching within herself for the solutions.

“I consciously started to visualise myself growing wings when at the precipice so when the nightmares came instead of throwing myself over, I would grow wings and fly high above all the pain,’ she said.

After her time at Warburton, Connie returned to Toorak with a new sense of self value and self-belief.

She contacted a business associate of her husband who knew of her dreadful home life and empathised with the situation.

She asked him to secretly give her work to do at home which was writing marketing plans for his clients and he would pay Connie in cash.

Once she built up enough money, Connie rented a furnished apartment, booked a taxi and ran away with only a handful of clothes.

She left all her designer clothes, jewellery, cars and all the materialistic things behind. “All those things meant nothing to me,” she said.

“The only thing of value I took with me was my new and empowered inner self.” From there she completely rebuilt her life.

Reconnecting with family, within a year she had an amazing job, her own apartment, furniture, car and clothes.

Most importantly, she had a greater sense and appreciation of herself and what really mattered in life.

At that time, Connie remembered what her dad used to say to her as a child about kindness; if you are kind to others not only will it enrich their lives, but it will also enrich your own soul, as your sense of self value grows the more you will rely on your inner self to conquer any obstacle.

So, this started Connie’s journey of being part of many charitable organisations in Melbourne.

In 2000, she began a private network called Connie’s Angels with the mantra, empathy equals hope.

It started with forming a local group of women who have been through terrible challenges in their lives and had conquered.

“When I would hear of someone who was going through a particular challenge, I would match them with one of my Angels who had gone through a similar challenge to be an empathetic ear and shoulder, someone who had walked in their shoes,” Connie said.

This network of angels grew, and through word-of-mouth, networks began in other communities.

These days through her Facebook page and the work behind the page, she has a private network of Connie’s Angels around the world.

“What I’ve come to understand is that going through some of the dreadful life experiences and reaching into myself for solutions has given me a deep sense of empathy for others and their challenges,” she said.

“Practising kindness and empathy is a very powerful thing.

The more you seek to understand others, the more you understand yourself, your value and purpose in this sometimes-challenging world.

“It gives you a sense of worth, and a deep belief in yourself; somehow no matter what you may go through, you have that inner superhero weapon that is greater than any obstacle.” Connie’s touching story truly epitomises what life is about.

Brave, strong people baring the depths of their soul, their pain and trauma and the story of the path back to a positive life.

The ability to rise above and completely bounce back and thrive in the incredibly inspiring way Connie has, just cannot be adequately described in words.